i'm not quite sure what i want ):
ugh, i really want to be the kind of person who looks back on her life and laughs, but i'm just not that type. i look back and go omg, disgusting! and cringe at the thought of things i didn't do right. i really hate the mistakes i made.
i need to learn to forgive myself, or i'll keep being miserable ): i've told myself this countless times, and there was only once when somebody actually understood me enough to touch on this point. i don't think that person actually knew how much of an impact his words had on me, though.
it doesn't help that i'm such a reckless person, either.
%&)(#@&!%()@$*%
):
and maybe i do want to be a forgettable part of ___, because i'm not proud of how i've spent the past ____ and i'm disgusted by the way i've acted. your words made me think alot, and even though i may not have made an impact on your life, damn it, you've made an impact on mine. okayy i'm just emo-ing abit, will (probably) be back to my normal happy facade in the morning!
